One definition of an addiction is “a compulsive behavior that leads to negative consequences.” What better way to explain what happens when we eat more than we should. We gain weight, feel bad, become less healthy and engage in destructive behaviors like dieting. Given how destructive overeating is, why do we do it?

Being addicted to food is pretty easy to explain if you do a little research on “pain avoidance.” Pain avoidance simply means that human beings by nature will do everything they can to avoid pain.

When we eat, especially if we eat highly desirable foods like sweets, fats and salt, we are being satisfied and rewarded and we feel pleasure, often in heavy doses. When we deprive ourselves of food, like when we are trying to diet, we are creating “pain” in the form of no satisfaction and no reward. Thus eating feels good, not eating is painful.

The psychological research about the relationship between pain and pleasure is pretty well established and its effects can easily be seen in everyday life. Most of us when faced with a painful choice will walk away instead of getting hurt, either physically or emotionally. Few people choose the painful route because walking away is simply less painful, even if it’s something we’ll have to deal with later. The immediate pain avoidance response is almost always the choice we make.

This is what happens when we overeat or eat something we know we shouldn’t. When we think about food or are actually eating the food, our brain is deciding which is the more pleasurable or less painful option, eat or not eat. As much as we know we shouldn’t eat that second helping of food or that donut, our brain recognizes the pleasure it will get when we do eat. It recognizes that not eating is the painful alternative and as usual, picks the least painful choice.

The next time you find yourself in the kitchen and decide you want to eat something, even though you know you’re not hungry, be aware of the mental gymnastics your mind plays in order to get you to eat. It will say “this time won’t hurt” or “I won’t do this tomorrow” or “I’ll work it off at the gym tonight.” These excuses are nothing more than your brain’s attempt to put off the pain to a later date. Unfortunately for us, we’ll go through the same routine the next time the choice is up for grabs.

So yes, most of us have food addiction and the only way to change it is to figure out how to make eating less, a more enjoyable choice.